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June 2007

Monthly Archive

The Bible’s Secret Files : Twiggy

30 Jun 2007 | : Engleza

Now, lots of people don’t know who Twiggy is mainly because Christianity, and God in particular tried to keep this a secret. Basically, at the beginning of time, God was not the only God created, although he was the most gifted. Beside his warlike twin brother, Allah and his sexually obsessed older brother Brahma…God had a cousin.

This cousin was no ordinary deity. He was retarded. Alhough Galacon (the guy who created everything , then misteriously disappeared) wanted to give him a cool name like Thornazar or Sod, all Twiggy could utter was ”Twigeeeeee”. So , this was it ! God had a retarded cousin named Twiggy. Somehow ashamed, he decided not to include the chapter about diety creation in the Bible. Even so…Twiggy’s legacy still reigns…

-Do you know why good people die all the time ? Mainly because God can’t keep Twiggy tied to the bed all the time !
-Know why Satan exists ? Because Twiggy tricked one of God’s beautiful but dumb lieutenants that God uses a syntethic lotion for his perfect skin.
-Do you know why lots of pure souls burn in hell ? Cause Twiggy messed up the Heaven and Hell indicators ! (He played ”smack the squirrel” with them)
-Know why wars are waged all the time ? Because Twiggy seems to think that throwing candy from the sky at people is good fun.
-Do you know why George W. Bush was never assasinated ? Because Twiggy had a son…
-Know why God sometimes doesn’t answer your deepest and purest prayers ? Cause Twiggy comes near his prayer-player and goes ”Neneneeeaah….Neannneanenenahh…”
-Know why the Romanian educational system exists ? Cause Twiggy likes to make lemonade out of the tears of children. (Even Satan is jealous !)
-Do you know why gay people exist ? Because…well, I don’t know…maybe they just like it that way

Graphical Description : Can’t make one, since I’m not a ”heathen”. However, most Twiggy represenations show us an old man, drooling, with a cloggy beard, an alcohool candy in one hand and a thunder in the other.

The thing is Twiggy is responsible for most evil in the world – not out of bad intentions but out of sheer stupidity. This is why we should cut God some slack and let the guy rest at times. We can pray to Twiggy instead – maybe he’ll do something good for a chance. Repeat after me : Bueaaahh..Bueaahh..Twiggeee…Money Me ! (Instead of making the sign of the cross, try hoping around in the room)

P.S : Never say his name out loud or he might hear you …he’ll wanna come and play afterwards !

La o bere…

29 Jun 2007 | : Viata de zi cu zi

Incepe sa ma intrige din ce in ce mai mult conceptul de ”iesit la o bere”. Nu bautura galbena obtinuta din malt\hamei si apa constituie obiectul meu de interes ci efectiv conceptul de a ”iesi la o bere”.

E weekend, vrei sa te relaxezi…ce faci ? Iti iei prietenii la o bere ! Nu consum bere insa ideea in sine pare justificata. E normal, vrei sa te relaxezi sa mai povestesti cate ceva cu vechii amici. Uneori, aici apare o problema : Ce se intampla cu cei care ies la bere o data sau chiar de doua ori pe zi ? Ce naiba au oamenii astia (cartieristi, pensionari, someri) sa-si spuna atat de des ? Pot sa iasa la o bere, la o tuica, la un vin, la un pahar de spirt…dar de ce ? Probabil asta constituie o metoda de a umple timpul liber si de a cheltui banii pe care nu-i au. (Evident ca nu-i au din moment ce de doua ori pe zi simt nevoia sa se duca la
o bere).

Majoritatea discutiilor de ”la bere” se rezuma la ”Ce ai mai facut in ultima vreme ?” si eventual la femei, daca vidul intelectual te cotropeste. Dar ce mai puteai sa faci, ce femei sa mai vezi, de-azi noapte pana azi-dimineata ? Nu cred ca cineva discuta la o bere concepte de teoria relativitatii restransa sau despre faptul ca ejacularea unui delfin ar putea decapita un om (I’m serious).

Ce anume aveti sa va spuneti oameni ? Puteti sa aveti o discutie inteligenta la o astfel de intalnire. Pana la urma face parte din comportamentul nostru ca fiinte sociale dar cand petreci 50% din timp in bar, cand nu stiti sa faceti decat mistouri ieftine (”caterinca” daca vreti), cultura voastra este o varza totala (daca e) iar subiectele de discutie se limiteaza la femei, fotbal si la politica pe care nu o intelegeti …apare intrebarea : De ce ? Raspunsul este evident : Pentru a impartasi si celorlalti axioma scarpinatului in fund…

Mentionez : Nu sunt impotriva iesitului ”la o bere” (pe care de altfel il practic, doar ca fara bere si doar atunci cand simt nevoia unei iesiri si evident, a unei discutii inteligente) insa asta nu poate deveni o ocupatie generala ! Pentru multi deja a devenit o scuza sau un mod de a parea ”cool”.

P.S : As putea spune ca lipsa culturii este suplinita printr-un afect rudimentar…dar parca nu-mi vine.

BAC ?

29 Jun 2007 | : Social, Cultural, Politic

Hmm..azi dimineata, prin intermediul unui vechi amic am aflat ca la BAC-ul de anul acesta, la proba de limba si literatura romana, cineva a tras o varianta care-i va aduce damnarea unei generatii ….si anume ”Caracteristicile limbajului intr-o poezie traditionalista studiata/Imaginarul poetic traditionalist – Text suport : Ion Pillat – Aci sosi pe vremuri sau Vasile Voiculescu – In Gradina Ghetsemani

Desi Voiculescu mi-a placut foarte mult ca prozator, inca nu pricep : Cine si cu ce scop face subiectele astea ?

P.S : Cred ca mai vine o poezie cand am timp si chef 😛

Netul si agresivitatea – Branding-ul de ID

28 Jun 2007 | : Social, Cultural, Politic

Mai mult cat sigur ca nu sunt singurul care a observat ca netul, si in mod deosebit forumurile (acolo moderarea este mai putin activa decat pe un blog) intretin agresivitatea si mentin disensiunile active.

Odata ce esti ascuns in spatele unui nickname, sau cel putin cat nu ti se vede fata, este foarte usor sa fii ”rege”. Nu o sa intru in dezbatarea ce priveste activitatea pustilor de 40 de kg cu tot cu unitatea centrala care se dau lei pe net. Studiul pubertatii nu este domeniul meu de activitate.

Problema este ca anumite persoane creeaza in jurul nick-ului lor de pe net, al alter-egoului virtual daca vreti, o anumita imagine. Ii putem spune ”branding de ID”. Rar se intampla ca aceasta imagine sa fie una pacifista si impaciuitoare. Vorbesc din propria experienta, pentru ca nici intalnirea cu mine pe anumite forumuri s-ar putea sa nu fie tocmai placuta. (mai ales daca ma contraziceti pe partea de genuri muzicale :P).

Practic, zecile de persoane implicate intr-o anumita sectiune de pe un forum au o imagine virtuala la care tin fantastic.Practic , branding-ul de ID se transforma intr-un schimb de orgolii. Fiecare o tine pe-a lui, no matter what. (Indiferent daca a gresit sau nu, fiecare incearca sa-si pastreze viu brand-ul.)

Acest tip de branding este un lucru riscant datorita faptului ca intretine o tensiune psihica inutila (luptatul cu morile de vant) si prin faptul ca poate deteriora relatii in viata reala. Sigur, multe orgolii au fost infrante dupa discutarea problemei fata in fata insa in alte cazuri s-a ajuns la declaratii de razboi reale. Take it easy…

Multi eroi de debara nu au curajul de a-si sustine afirmatiile fata in fata insa majoritatea pot dar comoditatea sau lipsa de timp nu ii lasa sa o faca. Astfel, avem o groaza de oameni care-si impun obsesiv conceptele, in mod agresiv, online, ajung practic sa depinda de stilul asta de discurs.

P.S : Cred ca si eu pastrez spiritul viu uneori…shame on me.

Tagged back !

26 Jun 2007 | : Software, Hardware, Online, Viata de zi cu zi

Am fost taguit de tskdesign si de data asta nu am refuzat pentru ca si eu am pornit un tag mai jos (vedeti tag-ul cu relatia ideala, care merge la cine doreste sa-l faca )

Ok, then…hai sa satisfac curiozitatile. Tag-ul merge pe ideea ”muzica si momentele” :

1. How are you feeling today?
Alphaville – Forever Young

2. Will you get far in life?
Queen – Princes of The Universe

3. How do your friends see you?
Elvenking – The Wanderer

4. Will you get married?

Blind Guardian – The Maiden and The Ministrel Knight (hihi)

5. What is your best friend’s theme song?
Uhmm…some old Linkin Park tune, maybe..

6. What is the story of your life?
Iron Maiden – Die With Your Boots On

7. What was high school like?
Eternal Tears of Sorrow – Blood of Hatred

8. How can you get ahead in life?
3 Inches of Blood – Destroy the Orcs 😀

9. What is the best thing about your friends?
Blind Guardian – Face The Truth

10. What is in store for this weekend?
Accoustic Alchemy – The Beautiful Game

11. What song describes you?

Sabaton – Primo Victoria

12. To describe your grandparents?
Zavaidoc – La Calul Balan

13. How is your life going?
MacBeth – How Can Heaven Love Me ?

14. What song will they play at your funeral

Colibri – Alte Clipe Traite, Alt Epilog \ Blind Guardian – The Bard’s Song

15. How does the world see you?

Battlelore – The Mark of The Bear

16. Will you have a happy life?
Vivaldi – Sinfonia C Dur

17. What do your friends really think of you?
Blind Guardian – Another Stranger Me

18. Do people secretly lust after you?
Sonata Arctica – Kingdom For A Heart (Haven’t listened since 10th grade)

19. How can I make myself happy?
Gregorian – Moment of Peace

20. What should you do with your life?
Edguy – Superheroes (Here comes Coffee-Man baby !)

P.S : Din nou, in stilul caracteristic, tag-ul merge la cine doreste sa-l faca 😀

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